I have noticed in the news here lately that a lot of people are stealing my ideas. Ideas that I had well before these people could possibly claim to come up with them. What ideas do you ask? Well, I’ll show you who stole my ideas.


1. That woman who had octopolets, octupelts, octoplats, octopus, you know, eight kids that look the same. Here was my original idea.

I was going to become famous by having septuplets. When I do this, I will make sure there is no way I could possibly take care of them. This way the tax payers will have to help me raise my own kids, and I’ll do all this while pretending I’m just like Angelina Jolie.


2. Chris Brown.

I still don’t really know what he actually does, but I do know he stole my idea. I was going to get a famous girlfriend, get into an argument with her over car keys and then proceed to slap her around. I don’t really know what purpose that would serve, but not all my ideas are winners.


3. Michael Vick.

I had always planned to have dogs fight each other, go to jail for that, and then try to come back to the National Football League.


4. Albert Einstein

I originally came up with the nuclear bomb and e=mc2. Einstein gets credit for my idea! If I have my way he will soon be e=mc dead.


5. Abraham Lincoln.

If it wasn’t for him, it’d be me who freed the slaves and got shot in the head by John Wilkes Booth. Stupid Lincoln….


6.  I’m just really angered by this.  But I had originally thought of building a giant planet shaped space station that could destroy entire planets.  Blast you George Lucas!!!!!!!!!!!!